Tuesday, January 24, 2006

Mike Ditka Suggests Staggering Into Bathroom During Super Bowl

CHICAGO (Wireless Flash - FlashNews) – If you want to ensure a safe Super Bowl party, make sure there’s plenty of staggering into the bathroom.

That’s the straight poop from football coach Mike Ditka, who is trying to help Americans avoid a crappy situation: The world’s largest toilet bowl clog.

It is estimated that 90 million Americans will head to the can during the Super Bowl halftime on Feb. 5, and Ditka fears a toilet clog of historical proportions.

So he’s recorded a public service announcement at www.halftimeflush.com to help Americans put together a game plan to prevent a “pooper bowl” catastrophe.

Ditka suggests staggering the number of people who go to the john and says it’s good manners to give women and children priority.

He also suggests Americans stock up on Scott tissue which dissolves four times faster than other T.P.

The halftime flush won’t just be a problem at American homes. Ditka predicts some players will have to answer nature’s call during the game but “the smart ones” will take care of their business beforehand.

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