Lisa Cohn, co-author of One Family, Two Family, New Family: Stories and Advice for Stepfamilies (RiverWood Books), says although she felt hurt when her current husband bought flowers for his ex-wife on Cohns first Valentines Day as his wife, she soon realized that it was important for him to give the ex a gift.
She says her hubbys kids from his first marriage needed to see that their mom was still an important part of the family, and the gift sent that exact message.
Cohn says chocolates and candy can also be appropriate gifts for an ex, as long as youre buying them to be from your kids too. Otherwise, the romantic overtones may send a mixed message or give your children false hope that mommy and daddy may remarry.
But if youre going to get a Valentines Day gift for an ex, Cohn says its also a good idea to overcompensate a little with your current spouse by taking a romantic weekend with them.
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