Monday, December 7, 2009


Bacon Envelopes Save Postal Service

SEATTLE (Wireless Flash - FlashNews) – A new line of bacon-flavored envelopes may single-handedly save the U.S. Postal Service.

“MMMvelopes” are paper letter envelopes that look and taste like a strip of bacon.

Co-creator Justin Esch says the adhesive on the seal can be licked several times from end to end for authentic bacon flavor.

They taste so good, people may start using snail mail again.

He figures they could “save the postal system” because people love a quick snack and will be more excited to send mail.

He’s slightly worried for postal workers, however, since more dogs may chase them down if it looks like they’re carrying bacon.

Postmen may be tempted to tamper with the envelopes, although Esch isn’t sure if steaming them open makes it smell like bacon.

Esch says MMMvelopes are “four trillion years in the making.”

Since the beginning of time, envelopes have “tasted like armpit,” but now corresponding via mail is finally enjoyable.

(Contact numbers available only to subscribing media or trial media users. You can request samples at the Wireless Flash web site.)
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