Monday, May 8, 2006

Bigfoot Researcher Needs Woman Who Looks Like Skunk Ape

OCHOPEE, Fla. (Wireless Flash - FlashNews) – Ladies, if you have the face of a Skunk Ape, a Bigfoot researcher in Ochopee, Florida, wants to talk with you.

David Shealy isn’t monkeying around. It seems it’s mating season down in the Everglades for the Skunk Ape, a creature described by observers as “Bigfoot’s smaller, smellier cousin.”

Shealy is currently tracking a lone male Skunk Ape, who has been known to flash himself at female tourists.

The creature hasn’t been seen for a few weeks but Shealy hopes that going out in the woods with a woman who facially resembles a Skunk Ape will bring the hairy creature out of hiding.

Shealy will choose his candidate by June 3 and wants to hold the expedition during a time when “Miss Skunk Ape” is on her period because the odor supposedly is an aphrodisiac to the creature.

If that doesn’t work out, he may just take a box of leftover sanitary napkins in the woods and see if that makes the Skunk Ape come running.

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