Wednesday, June 3, 2009

‘Sin-Eating’ And Elvis Make Dying Easy

PHILADELPHIA (Wireless Flash - FlashNews) – When you’re on your deathbed, having your sins forgiven to the sounds of Elvis makes crossing over easier.

So says “sin-eater” CAConrad, who performs bizarre ceremonies for those who are dying or dead, which consist of putting a sheet over the body, placing food atop it, letting the food “absorb” all the sins from the person’s body, and then eating the food to take their sin away.

He performs these “sin-eating” ceremonies while listening to Elvis music because The King’s ditties are magical and “lighten the load” of the soul when it crosses over into the afterlife.

He says, “Elvis is being used all over our planet in magical practices, much like Jesus. He’s part of a new pantheon of gods. We use his music because its vibrations have a healing quality and alleviate grief.”

CAConrad assures that “sin-filled” foods don’t taste any different, though they do leave him feeling heavy and bloated.

However, after listening to a couple Elvis songs, he feels normal again.

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